My best friend B and I go all out for fancy dress- we freaking love it, it's pretty much an obsession with us, last year we lived in our own house in Huddersfield and so we decided to throw an epic house party, we decorated the house, got a ton of party food and costumes - all on a stupidly limited budget because we were poor uni students, scraping to get by, yet we managed to get everything sorted.
Our costumes were awesome, but thanks to a virus spreading through uni like wildfire, all of our friends were sick, and so at our party there was just the four of us. Mega disappointment.
This year I live back down South and B and her fella have moved to London in a gorgeous mahoosive house and she invited me up and suggested we go out and celebrate in London. This sounded like a completely brilliant idea to me and I agreed immediately.
I didn't know what I wanted to dress up as, I have done most everything in terms of fancy dress and I like to be somewhat different because most girls use Halloween to dress like sluts.
When I got to B's we went shopping and we found some cheap prosthetics - B is awesome at creative stuff, she had done her fella a mask so he'd look like one of The Gentlemen from the Buffy episode 'Hush' it was friggen terrifying, but also brilliant.
We decided to go as Zombies, which I couldn't wait to do, I've always said I'd do well in a zombie Apocalypse but I thought it might be fun to do the zombie thing.
B and I were waiting for her fella to finish work and so we decided to get us ready, I'd bought this gorgeous little white baby doll dress earlier and it was from an outlet store so super cheap (so cheap I bought 2) however the only size they had was 2 sizes bigger than I am, so B had to help me and safety pin the sides so that it fit better and I had to wear a top underneath to not inadvertently flash anyone. ;)
One thing we forgot to buy however, which is a MASSIVE oversight, was the fake blood, so we looked up recipes online to make our own - which is perhaps our second mistake of the evening. Flour, red food dye - oh looks to pink, we need to make it darker let's add coffee - nope still needs to be darker - how about soy sauce - genius. The colour was right - the mixture however had become insanely sticky and fricken reeked!
To help me forget my dress woes B made me this drink - I can't remember what she calls it but it's red wine and cola, it gets you drunk quickly and you don't get a hangover from it, it's genius and we drank copious amounts whilst doing our outfits and makeup. B has all kinds of special makeup and did all my prosthetics, I had to wear this bit of fake skin over the entire right side of my face, I'm short sighted at the best of times but covering up one of my eyes and making my vision poorer is not my best idea.
Once we were all dressed up and ready to go we got in the car and drove to the station, there were a few people dressed up at the station, but none like us, B was an amazing vampire and she was dressed very sexily, her boyfriend looked terrifying and I looked somewhat normal when my hair was covering my face, but when people saw the right side of my face, they'd stop and gape, completely freaked out - it was fun to watch all the double takes.
We got some looks on the train which was only to be expected and was quite frankly really funny.
Once we arrived in London we got on the underground where we got more looks and we headed to Camden - it's where all the cool kids go don't you know? :P
We sat down and I see this group of tourists sitting opposite, and this little creepy dude gets his phone out and starts snapping shots- I felt really, really uncomfortable, but also a bit like a celebrity :D I am after all a showoff by nature.
We get off at Camden and are ambushed by people thrusting fliers at us, we take a few, but we know where we're going - there's a ball going on at KoKos, I went there for a 3Oh!3 concert so I know it's a cool venue and how to get there, we make our way, B and her fella holding on to me because with only one eye my depth perception is WAY off.
We get to the club and the line to get in is INSANE I didn't want to waste all evening outside in the freezing cold, so we traipsed back and go to one of the pubs to get a drink and ponder where to go.
Everyone in the pub turns to look at us, but we stand in the corner drinking and chatting, a group of men walk past us and one of the guys gets all up in my face and starts talking about my makeup, I don't speak idiot so I had no idea what the hell he was going on about, I just gave him the ol' raised eyebrows, smile and nod, that you have to give to simpletons to make them go away.
We decided after a while to head to the Electric Ballroom - which is fine by me, because it is AWESOME there, a fantastic venue with great music and a good atmosphere and not too expensive.
We had a little banter with the staff - possibly too much because the woman doing the patting down, seemed to spend a little too much time checking the girls, I almost told her she had to buy me dinner first.
We get in, get some drinks head out to the dance floor and who should we run in to? The weirdo from the tube! yay and who else - the simpleton from the bar! It was like a freakshow reunion, I was oh so happy.
We all had fun dancing and drinking and I happened to set my eye on a very good looking man, however, without full use of both of my eyes my flirting was rendered useless and he left without me getting to molest him. Unfortunate. All was not lost however because the lovely barman supplied me with a free drink.
When we left the club, we didn't take in to account that the tube shuts at a certain hour and we had to get halfway across London. B's fella decides to get some KFC and we wait outside for him and we strike up some conversation with a sweet Italian boy. After a little banter we're on our way again and head to a bus stop, only none of us know where we're going and we're all a little too drunk to be dealing with timetables. I let B and her fella ponder about which bus we need to get and I slump down on the bus stop bench, wishing I could just teleport home already 'cause I am exhausted when this very sweet 'vintage topshop range' girl asks if I'm ok. I look up to tell her that I'm fine - forgetting about my horror makeup until she shrieks and draws the attention of everyone. I mumble an apology for scaring her but inside am fighting the hysteria of how funny her reaction was.
We decided to walk, once more my depth perception is very much in question and our directional skills are slim to none, however after a long, long walk we miraculously arrive at the station - only to find it closed because of engineering works. It's now 3am, the station won't reopen til 6 or 7 and I don't want to be hanging around for that long. We walk over to the other station hoping that a train will be there for us, as I'm walking I decide now would be a fantastic time to take the prosthetics off - along with half of my skin because the glue needs to be soaked with a dissolving liquid. I am then struck blind when I lose my retina thanks to the bright station light.
We find a train and get on, but there is no information posted and we worry it's the wrong train, so we get off the train walk down the platform - feet killing us at this time, especially B who is in high-heeled boots, we find out it is in fact the correct train and have to walk all the way back to get on it.
We gratefully sink in to our seats, it's a nearly empty carriage, one other man in it, and we're in a booth with three seats and next to a heater, it's bliss. Our train doesn't leave for an hour but I don't even care, I'm sitting and I'm warm. I'm just starting to drift off to sleep when the man in the carriage does the most hideous loud hacking wet cough and snort. It turns my stomach, but I let it go and try to relax. He does it again. I sigh and mutter, B's fella thinks it's gross too, but we try to relax. He does it again.
"I'm out." I said and get up before I decide to smack him in the head for being vile and leave the carriage.
We sit in another carriage, B and her fella next to her and me across the aisle from them.
It's peaceful for about 15 minutes until a group of chavs get on and sit right by us. At the time I was worried we'd have constant harassment, but they were actually ok, gobby and stupid but not abusive, and so I relaxed.
Just as the train started to move, another man walks into the carriage and sits opposite me - I hate it when people do that, there's a train filled with empty seats but you sit right by me freakshow - awesome.
I ignored him and kept my eyes closed, just trying to relax and will the journey away, as we start to approach our stop I open my eyes and see B and her fella staring at me - a little disconcerting.
"Are we near our stop?" I ask and B looks at me very seriously, which it turn, makes me feel more serious.
"Yeah, come here." She motions me over and so I go sit with them. At our stop the creepy guy from near me gets off first and B glares daggers at him.
"What? What's up?" I ask as we get off the train.
"He was acting weirdly, and he kept staring at your legs." B said obviously furious.
And this is why I love her. If I'd been on the train by myself that guy would have creeped me out. But I was on the train with her and her fella, and I was wearing leggings under my dress. He hadn't tried to talk to me or touch me. He could look all he wanted, but B was being protective of me and I think that's really sweet.
We walked tiredly out of the station (none of us had purchased tickets and we'd gotten away with it - tiny lawbreaking offenses really give you a buzz) and we got a cab to the house, when we walked in we all looked like zombies, we grunted out a night and I collapsed in to bed, completely spent from the best Halloween I have ever had.
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